Patients sometimes ask me questions of a sexual nature, and I typically take these queries in stride. One patient, though, caught me totally off guard and left me temporarily nonplussed.

Jane was a meek, even mousy, middle-aged woman who dressed very conservatively and looked like a prototypical Sunday school teacher. She seemed to me to be totally asexual, judging from her appearance and demeanor. She'd come to the ER because of a urinary tract infection, and I covered the usual topics in discussing this with her: drink cranberry juice, plenty of water, and so forth. “Can I still use my vibrator?” she asked.

I broke out into a sweat. I'd never had a patient get to me like this before, but she had struck a nerve in me and I suddenly saw her as a living, breathing person rather than a patient. What rattled me was that my earlier conception of her was not meshing very well with reality. “It depends. What kind of vibrator are you referring to?”

“The kind I stick inside me and rub around my clitoris,” she answered matter-of-factly.

Of course, I thought. Why did I even ask? “You may, but just be sure to urinate afterwards.” That may or may not have been necessary depending on her routine with the vibrator, but I wasn't in a mood to learn more details of her sex life.

“Does it matter how big it is?” she asked.

More beads of sweat popped out on my now-glistening forehead. “Probably not,” I responded.

“I hope you don't think I'm a pervert for using it, but I've never had sex with a man, and I probably never will. Men aren't attracted to me, but that doesn't mean I don't have urges and desires. I've been told that I look very Puritanical, but I'm not. Do you want to know what my fantasies are?”

“Not really,” I said as I exited the door of her room.

And so ended my most awkward patient encounter of all time. It still embarrasses me to this day—not what she said, but my inept way of responding to it. I've had patients say far more shocking things to me which I've handled with aplomb, so I shouldn't have been so flustered by her. After speaking with a patient who enjoyed getting drunk and giving her dog a blowjob, speaking with a lady who had a vibrator and a few fantasies should have been no big deal.

In retrospect, I think my awkward reaction stemmed from the fact that her appearance and otherwise low-key demeanor (I'd seen her before in the ER for some minor, unrelated problem) were so incongruous with her appearance. I know that I was guilty of having a stereotypical preconception of how she should act based on how she dressed, but in my defense, extremes of dress usually are associated with predictable behavioral patterns. Take a woman dressed in a conservative business suit, or one dressed like a hooker on Woodward Avenue in Detroit. With occasional exceptions (some of which are described in this site), women who dress like hookers are much more likely to be hookers or act like hookers than women who dress like corporate CEOs. Or, if you do not believe me, research this subject yourself. You will find that people routinely prejudge others based on their appearance and dress. When behavior does not conform to one's expectations, it is natural to be surprised. And I was!

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Living in an organized home can reduce your stress level and save you time. One of the secrets of organization is to use slatwall and its accessories in as many rooms as you can, such as your garage, basement, office, shop, laundry, utility room, rec room, kid's playroom, gym, closets, pantry, shed, sunroom, poolroom, craft room, mudroom, or pole barn. Walls are more attractive when they are covered with slatwall instead of drywall, but the primary advantage of slatwall is that it makes it easy to organize things and keep them organized. Your storage needs will inevitably change in time. With most home organization systems, reconfiguring your shelves and other storage accessories is such a bother that most people try to make do with the existing setup—and that's where the chaos begins. With slatwall, moving an accessory takes only seconds.

This photograph illustrates how accessories attach to slatwall

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